A good measure of how stressed you are is what you dream about. One of my dear friends said that she dreamt she was being chased by a lion!
I dreamt that my car broke down, I was rescued by the AA, they drove me off with all my children squashed in the back (it was my old car which only had 2 seats in the back) the brakes failed and we were heading for a large intersection in America! Analysis? Friend’s dream – she has an adversary stronger than herself! Mine? My life is out of control! It was the night before I was due to file my tax return!
What recurrent dream did you have as a child? Was it happy or sad? This could help decipher whether you had secure or insecure attachments to those around you. An insecure child often times grows up into an insecure adult.
How needy are you? Divorce is a good way of discovering your natural resilience. Feel able to face the future alone? Feel curious about the opportunities ahead? Or do you dread waking up in the morning? There is a big difference between missing someone you love and needing someone to fill a gap in your soul. Self analysis can slip into navel gazing but divorce is a time to reflect on who you are and where you are going.
Regard all adversity as an opportunity for personal growth. Keep a diary of your darkest moments – this is a good way of tracking otherwise unnoticed improvement. Have a worse event in your head. Whenever I feel overwhelmed I think of waking up naked in a rice field in China – realise that you can cope!